Something for the Weekend

By John Warrington, Counselling Minds

There’s something about Fridays at around 4:57pm.

The emails slow down. The group chats spark into life. Someone asks, “Big plans?” — and depending on how you’re feeling, that question can sound either inviting… or faintly exposing.

Because while weekends are marketed as 48 hours of sparkle and fulfilment, they can — for many people — feel surprisingly long.

And lonely.

Very lonely. 

When the Calendar Turns Up the Volume

Weekends can be challenging enough. But around key dates in the year — Christmas, New Year, Valentine’s Day, Easter, Mother's Day, Father's Day, summer holidays, even bank holiday weekends — the emotional volume seems to increase. 

The script grows louder:

• This must be magical.

• This must be memorable.

• This must be shared.

Online, the rush to catalogue it all can feel relentless.

Meals eaten.

Holidays taken.

Walks undertaken.

Airport selfies (with a photo of a glass of beer taken at the airport bar at 5am, with a hidden subtext that might as well say ‘Losers! Look at me about to go on holiday!!’).

Carefully posed nights out.

Children lined up in matching outfits.

On platforms like Instagram and Facebook, special occasions can look like glossy lifestyle campaigns.

It can begin to feel less like sharing and more like providing evidence — proof that life is being lived correctly.

And because so many people participate, not joining in can feel like opting out.

It can sometimes feel like an online version of The Emperor’s New Clothes, where we collectively admire curated perfection while privately wondering why it all feels slightly exhausting.

Choice — Not Obligation

Let’s be clear: there is nothing inherently wrong with sharing moments online.

It’s personal choice. 

If posting a holiday photo brings you joy, connection or creativity — that is your choice. 

Social media can help us stay in touch, celebrate milestones and express pride. 

The difficulty begins when posting stops being a choice and starts feeling like a requirement.

When the thought shifts from:

I’d like to share this

to:

I’d better post something — everyone else has.

No one should feel pressured to document their lives simply because it appears that everyone else is doing so.

You are allowed to enjoy a meal without photographing it.

You are allowed to go on holiday without narrating it.

You are allowed to have a wonderful time that remains entirely private.

A life can be deeply meaningful without being marketed.

What Gets Forgotten

In the scramble to curate our highlights, something vital can quietly slip out of focus.

Good health.

A safe place to live.

Love — given and received.

Friendship.

Kindness towards ourselves.

Moments of genuine rest.

These rarely make dramatic posts.

But if we didn’t have them, we would feel their absence profoundly.

Gratitude is not about pretending everything is perfect. It’s about remembering the foundations — the elements of life that truly sustain us.

When we pause to notice what is steady and present, comparison loosens its grip.

It’s Not Just Adults Feeling It

Perhaps most concerning is that this atmosphere of performance isn’t confined to adults.

Children in primary school now access counselling in increasing numbers.

Many feel overwhelmed — not only by social dynamics, but by the pace and pressure of modern childhood.

They are expected to:

• Transition confidently through different stages of school life.

• Manage academic expectations.

• Attend multiple after-school activities.

• Develop resilience, confidence and achievement — often simultaneously.

Childhood, which once contained more unscheduled time, is often tightly timetabled. Subjects which allowed children and teenagers to express and process emotions, such as drama, are increasingly marginalised in school timetables with a focus on more academic subjects. 

Add exposure to digital life — directly or indirectly — and the pressure to keep up can start early.

If adults struggle with comparison, imagine how confusing it can be for children still forming their sense of self.

The message can quietly become:

Be busy.Be impressive.Be progressing.

That’s a heavy burden for young minds.

Children are to be nurtured and allowed the time and space to grow; to not have the pressure and weight of expectation on their shoulders. 

They are not test and exam battery hens. 

They need time to rest, to play, to smile and to laugh . Just like adults do too. 

Compassion Over Competition

When we scroll through smiling faces and seasonal celebrations, comparison is the easiest reflex.

But compassion is the healthier one.

Compassion for ourselves when weekends feel empty.

Compassion for others who may be posting joy while carrying private struggles.

Compassion for children navigating growing expectations.

Everyone’s life contains unseen chapters.

And when we approach others with generosity rather than silent competition, something softens within us too.

A Different Measure of a Good Weekend

A good weekend may not be the one most documented.

It might be:

• A quiet meal enjoyed without interruption.

• A walk taken slowly rather than shared instantly.

• Time spent listening.

• An unscheduled afternoon.

• A conversation that stays offline.

You are not a brand.

Your family is not a promotional campaign.

And your worth is not measured in likes, comments or seasonal highlights.

If this weekend — or this particular time of year — feels heavier than it looks on other people’s screens, you are not alone.

Post if you wish.

Don’t post if you don’t.

But let it be a choice — not a pressure.

Pause.

Notice what you have.

Practise gratitude for the essentials.

Offer compassion outward and inward.

The most important aspects of life — health, love, safety and connection — do not need filters.

They simply need care.

Thanks for reading, John, Counselling Minds